a quiet morning , on my turf...matchless peace...then my mind succumbs to its endless chatter...'pretty scene, got to share on face book', and I do... Why? a moment ago I was in bliss with the solitude around me, happy to have this time away from it all...planing endless Waldon pond getaway moments...yes, life of a hermit in the jungle away from the traffic and the people. Therein the contradiction... Here I am sharing my moment of bliss and quiet with a host of unrestricted 'friends'. most, I would at best share a polite greeting but nothing more should we actually meet. In the secure womb of my home, I quite unabashedly open my heart ... post up my innermost soul.....what brings out this trust and warmth towards the other which is lacking in a real time meeting? for me, it is the security of my own space.. Which makes me softer and more benign. I don't see an enemy out there...'my friends' out there will not laugh at me...they are me and part of me...they accept my absurdities and blunders and forgive me as I forgive my self... Then why am i so weary and guarded of those I meet day to day...watching what I say and how I act...forever wondering what 'the others' would think. These "friends" on line are the same that I meet on the road... So its me...in my turf I'm safe in the delusion of 'good' in the other... And out of it I'm vulnerable in the delusion of 'bad' in the other...surely, the other did not change... What I see out there is simply a reflection of the state of my mind...delusional in its safety and delusional in its fears....
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